Normally, I wouldn't be posting family problems in a blog, but I feel such a need to vent to some people who might understand. I am SO annoyed and frustrated! I suppose I should be happy that my dad is taking me "seriously" when I tell him I think I have OCD. But at the same time, he's treating me like a gullible child. Sure, dad I decided I must have OCD from watching Monk and taking a survey I found on the internet! Do you really think I'm that stupid?!
He's being open to that I might have it, yet at the same time he's saying he hasn't seen any of the symptoms in me. Oh, really, father? "Why is all this junk around here? Why are we keeping these toilet paper tubes and kleenex boxes?" Well, dearest father, because I CAN'T throw them away!!! "Why are you taking such long showers?" Well, father, the REAL answer? I can't stop scrubbing and washing and rewashing and shaving and cleaning the razor. I've stopped even shaving because it takes so long, and still take an hour in the shower. That's not including the 15-20 minute prep for taking the shower, and who knows how long to dry off and get dressed afterward. Oh, yes, and while in the shower, I can't stop checking the clock to see how long I've been in there.
"Why are you still there touching the cat when I'm waiting for you?" Well, father, the honest answer is that I cannot stop; it doesn't feel "right" yet. And it's driving me MAD!!! Yet he doesn't see it. Duh; because he doesn't know the real reasons why I'm doing things. He himself has told me before that people with OCD are good at hiding it.
But really, what did I expect? He never seemed to take it seriously last year when my sister told him how bad my anxiety was getting; the anxiety attacks…. I say again–aaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!