It's amazing what can make anxiety spike up. The last week or so I've actually been doing quite well. I think a lot of this has to do with an awesome friend I met on here. We understand each other so well it's scary. 🙂

Anyway,also, I feel freer now that I finally told my anxiety to bug off while I gathered the information for my bills that I can't pay and passed it on to my dad, who has said he will help me with them.

So what happened? Besides the annoyingly detailed, weird, weird, scary dream I had last night….haha Well, see I go to my friends' place every Tuesday to help them out with things as a friend, and they pay me for it, too. Win-win there. 😛 But I have to depend on my sister for transportation. Today she asked me, "So what are you doing tomorrow?" Caught me by surprise. Turns out I forgot that she had told me that she's working late tomorrow–4:15 to 9:15pm, rather than 12:30 to 5:50pm.

Now what do I do? I told her I'dfigureit out, even as she gave helpful suggestions. Of course, the more options there are, the worseit is for me; I'm ready to shut down–justscream and hide. Normally, I'd just decide togo a different day or skip this week, but see–well, let me explain first who my friends are.They are a mom and her adult daughter. The mom has hadmultiple knee surgeries and now has had a back surgery, so has neededmore help off and on. Though I go over just to spend time with her, as well–which is why the day normally wouldn't matter. But see thistime, it does. She's just had a back surgeryrecently and Tuesday is her daughter's busiest workday, so it's good to havesomeone else there while she's gone.Ugh. I've probably just confused everyone nowif they'veactually bothered to readthis.

The sooner I call my friend to figure out what to do, the better. But I can't bring myself to call her 'cause I don't want to have to deal with making decisionsabout whatthe bestthing to do would be. Aaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!!!!!


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