hi, i'm katie and i'm 17. i've been told to talk about how i feel and that it's not healthy to bottle up my emotions. i just can't seem to find a light at the end of this tunnle. I hate feeling so sad and miserable all the time. Even though i have friends around me to support me and get me through this herd time in my life, i still feel so lonely. i now there are people out there that feel the same, i just haven't found one yet. I just can't see a point to anything anymore! I used to be such a bubbly, happy, funny and just simply loved life kind of person. Not now, it's a stuggle even just getting up in the morning! You know i really miss the old Katie, i just hope she comes back soon. i have read loads of recovery stories about depression, i don't have one yet. As soon as i do, i will be back to share it with you all. I just have to try and be strong and not let this "illness" get the better of me. I don't like it when people call it an illness or say your gonna get better. To me i'm not ill at all, ok maybe i get upset for no reason at all, i don't see that as "ill" but thats just me.i have recently started cutting myself, it's the worst feeling ever. It was like i wasn't doing it, like someone just took over my head! My own head is turning on me, i thought ur head was ment to be on your side? and not put horrible thoughts into your head. Likesucide, i don't want to kill myself, butto be honest sometimes i don't see a point tolife anymore. I don't see myself having a future! I want to havean amazing man in my life, kids,nice car,house ect,i just can't see any ofthis happen.There has to be a way out..

if u have any advice for me, please do:)

Thanks for taking the time to read this depressing story. Take care people.
love from katie xx