Luckily the half empty bottle of Jameson’s hadn’t broken. I picked up the bottle and left the brown paper bag behind. It was probably still usable but it had failed me and I didn’t want to try to use it again.

I walked toward the south of the lake, but I was starting to get cold. I was starting to sober up and I didn’t feel like drinking any more. I couldn’t find Housemate B anywhere, so I had a lie down on a park bench – the noose still wrapped around my neck and a half empty bottle of scotch propped up beside me.

I didn’t hear Housemate A calling, but I heard footsteps coming toward me.

“I’m so glad you’re ok”, she panted as she put her arm around me, “Been drinking the cheap stuff have you?”, as she picked up my bottle.

I heard her friend in the background making a phone call, but I was listening more closely to the breathing of Housemate A. She must have run a long way to get here, and she had placed a heavy bag beside the park bench. She took a blanket out of the bag while her friend continued to call people to let them know they had found me. I closed my eyes and she stroked my side and tried to talk to me.

Before long Housemate B was sitting beside my head on the bench and she started patting me. She didn’t talk as much as Housemate A, but I was so glad she was there. I was very happy lying there on that bench being comforted by my housemates. We have never been that chummy, but they are the closest things to friends that I have. I could have stayed like that for a long time.

Sister 1 was the next to arrive. She was startled when she saw the noose around my neck, and she took a step back to regain her composure. I didn’t see a lot of her because the police were right behind her. Once I heard a car pull up I knew something was up. Two policemen jumped out and the more senior started talking to me while the younger one started talking to my sister.

I wasn’t really in the mood for talking at this stage, but I couldn’t get the policemen to leave me alone. Unfortunately they had a duty of care to make sure I didn’t hurt myself.

“Mate just move on”

“I can’t move on. It is my duty to look after you”, he returned in a light Scottish accent which doesn’t translate well into a blog

“I understand that, but there are more important jobs than this. Just leave me alone and continue on with your job”

“Well unfortunately you have my undivided attention at the moment. There are a lot of people that were worried about you Matthew”

I stopped listening at this stage. The main gist of what they were saying was that they were waiting for an ambulance to take me to a hospital. All of a sudden my happy place had become very crowded. So I got off the bench and started walking home.

The policemen grabbed me after about three metres. My housemates had retreated away from where I was and let the policemen do their thing.

“If you don’t stay still then we’ll have to handcuff you”, the older one said, “Don’t do anything to embarrass yourself in front of all your friends Matthew”

Sad part was they were all the friends I had. Everybody watched me being talked down by the policemen. Eventually they searched me for dangerous objects and dragged me to the back of the squad car.

So I sat in the padded back seat of the police car and looked around. I couldn’t see my housemates anywhere. The only two people I could see was Sister 1 and one of my uncles. My uncle was saying something to my sister and she didn’t look interested at all. I knew she would have hated having that man try to console her. She looked so lonely sitting on that bench.

In the back of the car I started reading through the police scanner. It turns out that my sister made the call at around 11am (the time was now around 6pm). They had triangulated my mobile phone to the vicinity of D Park and had received a transfer order from my doctor. Basically they were able to bring me into hospital against my will and keep me there.

After waiting around for a quarter of an hour the policemen got bored of waiting and decided they would take me into hospital without waiting for the ambulance. I was lucid and there were no visible signs of injury. They informed my sister of what was happening and drove off to the station to collect the transfer order which they needed to admit me to hospital.

“Where’s Grantham street?”, said the younger officer

“I don’t know but I’ll find it”

I tapped on the back window. I knew where Grantham street was. But they were ignoring me at this stage. I was in a padded area, I wasn’t violent and they didn’t need to pay attention to me. So I slumped back in the seat and watched as they took the long way to the station.

As we left the station my uncle was waiting in the car park. The police wound down their window to let him know where they were taking me. I saw my chance and I mouthed some very angry words to him from the back seat. I didn’t know what to say so I shouted some gibberish with a very angry face and made sure I enunciated the f-word very clearly. I’m pretty sure he saw me and I was very pleased with myself. I was very angry with him for the way he tried to console my sister.

They took the long way to the hospital as well. These cops were useless drivers. When we finally reached the hospital the younger officer went into the emergency department with the paperwork while the older old stayed in the car. They didn’t let me out until the nurses arrived with the hospital bed. They had security guards all around and tried to coax me onto the bed.

“Nah it’s alright mate. I can walk”

Against hospital policy apparently. Grrr. So I sat on the bed cross legged as they wheeled me into the emergency ward.

To bed 15 and beyond.