At the end of 2019 I thought this was the best me so far yet the first day of the new year I had a breakdown and everything I have been hiding came out, I didn’t want to be here anymore. My poor boyfriend was there during this and completely saved me, my poor family now know how I feel and it’s honestly made me feel worse. I feel like I need to hide it even more now and I’m tired of it. I feel like I’m slowly giving up I hate my new job and don’t even care not going in, I haven’t seen my counsellor in months and am avoiding going back to the doctors. I hope this blog is going to help me, I can say what’s on my mind without upsetting anyone And I can say how I feel without feeling guilty. Fingers crossed this blog can help me.
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I’m sorry to hear you are struggling. I understand your wanting to hide the way you are feeling. I have been struggling with feeling both depressed and anxious since Christmas ended. I am not comfortable sharing my feelings with those around me either because I don’t think they can understand what I am actually going through. I am also looking for a place to share my feelings and learn how to deal with them from others who are going through similar experiences. I wish you well and hope we both may find some relief here.
I know all too well about hiding from your loved ones and showing them a bright, happy face. I know how tiring and exhausting it gets, how scary it is and how anxious it can make one feel.
Sometimes when you’re scared or sad or tired, you start to feel stuck and numb, you can’t move, you can’t budge, and you let yourself start sinking.
I hope you gather your courage and help yourself because sometimes the only person that can help you, that can save you, is yourself.