I've been feeling very angry lately, mainly at myself for a lot of the stupid things i've done..il explain in a sec.
A friend suggested i write a blog of emotions, i've never been a great writer so i've probably written this all wrong, or too bluntly or something, sorry! here we go:
..Fed up of being alone – too shy to do anything about it. (coward!) getting worse by the day.
Black sheep in the family – I'm just different!
I dread college everyday – sexual harassment (I'm weak).
Hate my job – again, I don't fit in!
Mourning – i miss my grandpa!!
Anger – I'd describe myself as a boiling kettle right now, and i don't know how to control it.
Too self-conscious- i think i worry about my appearance wayyy to much!! (i struggle walking down my street sometimes in front of a quewe of traffic).
Blushing- i've had it since..as long as i can remember, i wish i wasn't so easily embarrased, i think thats why half of my problems exist.
not being able to grow up- i'm stuck in this house, trying to earn money and live, but i still feel nervous about asking my mum if i can go out..(im 19!) :s
My boyfriend – i love him dearly, but i feel so bad.. i've got a problem at college at the moment with this guy who keeps sexually harrassing me, the other day he stuck his tongue down my throat and wouldn't let go, yeah i hate myself for it. i should be stronger! what am i thinking?! i've always been against cheating! urgh im disgusted!
so yeah i think thats everything just feels like alot of emotions flying round in my head all at once i don't like it 🙁
i don't quite know what response i'm after here..maybe a little reassurance?
i'd love a friend i could talk to (: xx