Couple of months ago, I became very concerned over the total immensity of volume of new information to absorb. It took me away from moving forward with my own dreams. So I instinctively set about looking for tools. One thing that felt empowering were crystals. I have a nice piece of uncut rose quartz to attract and send out love. I have another nice chunk of amethyst for opening my mind and keep wide my perspective. I have a nice phantom crystal of good size, and the newest addition is a piece of flourite, with greens and purples.

I had read that sometimes crystals disappear, which I found odd. But true to form, one day, my flourite wand came up missing. I had a good idea where to look and did so, without results. So I just gave up thinking, ok, it's wandered off somewhere… 🙂

For someone who believes in the magic of life, tools that are beautiful, eternal, and inspiring are important to me. When I go to my room, I am filled with peace and contentment. At least that is the plan…

I found the missing crystal right where I supposed it to be after everything else had been moved. Whether it will bring me light or not remains to be seen. It depends in large part with what I do with it at this point. Maybe friends are like that as well. They do tend to come and go, it seems. And when you get really close to one, and you get hurt, you tend to be a lot more cautious about embarking upon another relationship (delusion). haha

What are your crutches? Do you smoke? Fatal mistake. Do you drink beer? Dumb mistake. Why? Because most people can't function at their best when trashed. Do you rage against the darkness whenever you feel a little frustration? Do you push people away on purpose with your anger? What do you hide behind. Or do you have trouble saying no? Do you wonder why you get involved with things so far outside what you really want to be doing? Do you run back home to your safety bubble, your comfort zone, to escape? If I surround myself in pretty minerals, beautiful colors, and prefer to live in serene calming places, am I being selfish? Are these trappings and tools simply my crutch? If I lose one, will I meltdown? If I find it again, will I be stronger? Does any of this matter one whit anyway?

When you lose a friend, I think you have to look at it like being grateful that they were in your life at all. Being grateful that for that brief moment in time, you were lucky to know them and enjoy their company. Now is a new time, and new days with new opportunities. Maybe time for a new crystal as well!

Always be open in your heart. Do you close the door, because if you do, you will undoubtedly lose so much. Everyone deserves to be loved. And I find personally the most gratifying thing I have ever done is to love someone. But everyone knows that love hurts too. So I take that into consideration. But I am not closed to it.

Maybe sleeping with a piece of rose quartz under my pillow won't bring me a soulmate tomorrow, but maybe it keeps me awake and aware to the possibilities. It keeps me focused on what is important in life. It may come and go, but honestly, I would fall in love over and over again a million times were it even possible.