If life is a waste of time,
And time is a waste of life,
Then let's all get wasted together
And have the time of our lives.
Armand's Pizza, Washington , DC

Fighting for peace is like
Screwing for virginity.
The Bayou, Baton Rouge , LO

At the feast of ego
Everyone leaves hungry.
Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson , AZ

It's hard to make a comeback
When you haven't been anywhere.
Written in the dust on the back of a bus,
Wickenburg , AZ

If voting could really change things,
It would be illegal.
Revolution Books
New York , New York ..

If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?

Congress!
Men's restroom House of Representatives,
Washington , DC

Express Lane:
Five beers or less
Sign over one of the urinals
Ed Debevic's, Phoenix , AZ

You're too good for him..
Sign over mirror in Women's restroom
Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hill s ,CA

No wonder you always go home alone.
Sign over mirror in Men's restroom,
Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hill s ,CA

A Woman's Rule of Thumb:
If it has tires or testicles,
You're going to have trouble with it
Women's restroom
Dick's Last Resort, Dallas , TX