So the book asked a very interesting question which would lead to a more mindful mindset in looking for love, “what would I do if I had a partner? how would my life be different? And how can I do some of that now?”. To answer that question honestly, If I had a partner now I feel like I would be less bored especially during this pandemic. I would love someone to dance with, try new recipes with, go on walks with. It’s so damn boring here I think that’s something a partner would give me… somebody to do things with because before I had to go out and socialize to do all those things. how would my life be different? well of course I believe I would be happier and less lonely. I would feel like somebody cared enough to be with me. I also feel like I would be less anxious because I wouldn’t feel the need to socialize anymore which causes me great anxiety and stress. And how can I do some of that now? …um I can’t? haha… ok be positive…so activities I could do right now, I could call up some friends and set up times where we can go dancing, cook, walks and other stuff. I could also go ahead with my plan to move to a more exciting city that has more to do so I’m less bored and can find more like minded people. As for the other question… I could continue what I’m doing now and find out ways to be happier and less lonely un-coupled. so to summarize:
- set up activities with friends
- eventually move to more exciting city
- find ways to be happy and less lonely uncouples
the book also mentioned rumination which I do a lot. What I gathered is stop thinking about those negative thoughts… do something else, ruminating just makes you unhappy there is no point in doing. venting is also pointless. ruminate for a bit then let go and move on. ruminating may lead to inaccurate assumptions you start to believe… not good, best to not go down that rabbit hole. that’s how I interpreted it. Something else they mentioned was how unhelpful social media is which i agree with I’m glad i deleted instagram, snapchat and twitter. cant wait to delete facebook
Might need to check this book out. I’ve been single my whole life and I am still chasing happiness and trying to fill this void inside of me, maybe this book can help with that.