I hate feeling jealous and I’ve only felt true jealousy these past few months towards a person I’ve never even met before. I follow this stage actress on social media she’s also an author and you tuber. Recently she published her newest book and her following and family made the biggest deal as you should when someone publishes a book. I felt jealousy seeing her family and friends expressing how proud they were of her and how great her book was. As an author myself I did not experience such treatment. It’s not the success of the book I was jealous of it was the way her friends and family reacted was what I was jealous of. My family crapped all over me when my book came out and before. An aunt I was really close with was disappointed in me for perusing this career over something “normal”. My family didn’t even both coming to my book party. I hate feeling this way because it’s great she has that support. But being burned by people who were supposed to love and support me make me feel like I should get a little crumb of support. It shouldn’t be like pulling teeth just to get an ounce of it. I know when my next book comes out I’m the only person that’s going to make an big deal and once again other family will come around to make a big deal if they want to. I just look at the difference in her family and mine it just seems unfair. I would get support from my family if I got pregnant. Seriously, an unexpected pregnancy in my early 20s would get more support than me writing and publishing the book I’ve been developing since I was 15. I don’t feel bad for choosing to do what I want to do instead of what I have to do. The long history of young pregnancy and I’m the one of the few people who wanted a career and a life. I guess there’s an issue with breaking tradition.

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