When do we know when to let someone go?
Is there a sign, a mere symptom, A bell that dings?
Why do I love so deeply? I am only one, just a little soul in this HUGE world.So why cant I ever let go?
Am I destined to be alone in my shadow loving and hopelessly waiting for all the love I have for people that dont want it to just disappear or be welcomed in? There is no ryhme or reason to this madness of confusion I feel. I am forever lost in a state of trying to sort out reality and find my place. The searching has only lead to more lonesome. While I sit here not letting you or you or you go I take away from my happiness, my goals and dreams.
So the ever wonderous question, just how do I let you go? All of you!
I am a prisoner, trapped in everyone else's worlds, never seeking whats in this life for ME. As much as I try to hang on and find reason behinde it all or put logic to all the messed up paths, I have only distanced myself further from the mirror.
I am a helper, I care, I love beyond reason, and I am a F*&%ing door mat! Coldness of truth though, I allowed it all! Every bit of these thoughts I allow. The gulit, the caring, the love, the will to fight your life for you for god sake… Isnt that enough?
As it all unfolded I knew what it was taking you over, yet I try .. still I try. I watched as you tore yourself apart in fear and drug me down inch by inch with you. Here we are today, same sh*& different tune, yet I try… still I try.
Call me a lunatic, psycho, pathetic, but I love you… maybe way to much, so much you dont deserve this kind of dedication.
Six years for you, 5 for you and you and you and you. Drugs, lies, cheat, deceit, and any and everything you could do to show me I was a fool, and still I try.
Why do we believe in things that dont exsist? What is it about false hope that leaves you breathless and pulling at the reigns even tighter?
Well guess what my flesh eating parasite's I now choose ME!
I choose me to love and be a door mat for, I choose me to trust beyond reason and love with all that I am. I no longer choose YOU… none of you! No more excuses, no more endless reasons of why, no more pointing fingers of anger and blame, because today I LET GO!!!