Hello everyone, my name is LaReina, or you can call me Oriana. In 2017 I was officially diagnosed with Social anxiety and depression(non-specified), but in my Junior year of high school was when I actually realized I had it (2015). I’m now 21 years old, it’s 2018, and I’ve realized I’ve had this mental disorder for as long as I can remember. Which really isn’t that long because my memory also isn’t the same as others. My older sister can remember events from when she was four or five years old and I can’t even describe a day in junior high, or the teachers that I had! But back to the point, I can tell you that I was socially awkward and followed how my friends acted, but honestly through it all, I’ve never been myself with anyone but my family. I just wanted to fit in, but luckily by the time I got to high school I didn’t care anymore and basically developed the attitude of my mother lol. I had few friends and walked through the halls with my headphones in my ears, playing my angsty teenager music. I was constantly told by people who got to know that I looked mean and unapproachable, and for some reasons that’s how I wanted to be. Still to this day i’m told that I looked like a mean person when someone first meets me, but I have a natural resting B**** face. Nowadays most of my anxiety stems from holding my tongue and my current employment situation. Since I’ve started hating my job completely, I’ve developed body shaking in my sleep. I do not wake up to it but my boyfriend definitely does. This causes me to never reach Rem cycle(so I think), which makes me extremely exhausted no matter how long I sleep. I finally stopped holding my tongue at my boss and I honestly think it just made my anxiety shakes worse.
Basically this is my introduction, I’m learning about my disorder and trying to notice my triggers. I’m really hoping it will help me in the long run. I think next post I will share some of the few triggers I have noticed. Please comment with any advice or questions, I’ll try to answer the questions to my best abilities lol
Have a wonderful day/evening/night everyone. Don’t let the demons win.
Hi LeReina, I know how you feel about being a loner. I was a loner for many, many years until I got out of the hospital and attended therapy groups. and you know what, the people in therapy groups are the ones you want to befriend. They have been there tons of times. But they continue to focus on their lives as best as they can. And for your sleeping issue, try melatonin or some chamomile tea to relax at night.