i think depression is one of the most misunderstood things in the world. actually, i would say all psychological disorders and diseases are. for one, people think depression is an excuse, an outcome of trying to be suicidal. trying? how can you try to be suicidal? you either are suicidal or you aren’t. how can depression be an excuse? i really don’t think people understand that its a darkness that swallows you whole. people don’t understand the part where you have absolutely no control of how feel once you become lost in the trance of depression. they don’t understand the fact that we have to wake up each morning feeling guilty, feeling like we don’t belong. we all have our reasons of depression, but ultimately we all feel the same kind of pain, the same hurting. you can’t try to feel these things, or have an excuse and self-pity into believing something is wrong with you. something is wrong with us, and we can’t stop it. i’m tired of people jokingly saying, "oh god, i want to kill myself." do they realise that what they consider extremely humorous and unimportant is a harsh reality of ours we live through every day. do they really realise how bad this is? how much pain we feel and breath. how hard it becomes just to live? if i told you what i felt every night before we went to bed, i doubt even you would be able to sleep..

they don’t realise that even we get tired of feeling lonely, of feeling absolutely everything and nothing the world has to offer. they dont see that every waking moment hurts and hurts. they dont understand us when we say we just want it to go away…that we dont want to be anymore. to be. they don’t understand that we also want to be happy. they don’t understand that we’re trying that much harder to be what they consider normal in everyday life.