He pulled his gun, and shot not a blank, and left me dying, lying on the bank.

A twisted world soon did I find, I always knew I was out of line…

Off I went into outter space, too observe the world, too deteriorate…

Then time stops, and pulls me in, a black hole to be born again…

And think not of the past I try, But only in my sleepy eye.

I did some rituals yesterday, while at work, and at home…  Kept telling myself NO, don't do that.  Made me frustrated.  I did do a couple because I felt anxious.  Then I was mad at myself for doing them, I felt stupid.  I still feel stupid…  Then I got a really bad head ache.  I think because I smoked too many cigarettes and being frustrated…  It still hurts.  I need to stop smoking…

Ricky showed up at my building last night and we took a 40 min. brake.  Ricky is funny.  🙂  Then I finished my building.  Then went to the other building where I tried to avoid Gary and Ricky because I didn't feel like talking to anyone.  So I pulled the trash, and went outside on the balcony and listened to some music for about 15 min.  When I came back inside Ricky and Robin were there…  I didn't mind it I guess.  I had my alone time…

I want to call into work.  My body doesn't want to do anything.  But I make it.  I wish it were Friday…  So I could lay around all day…  But, I guess, that will not solve much of anything…  So maybe I  should just go shower, then cook dinner… 

Hey the dogs are chasing each other.      Sigh…