The utlimate betrayal is what I am dealing with now. For months my husband has promised if I found somewhow to go back to writing, I wouldn't have to worry about him trying to read my thoughts, he never has before. And finding this site has been good for me. Getting all my thoughts out of my head has helped me cope..

Last night, I got a text calling me a liar, he read one of my blogs, the one that happened to meantion an ex boyfriend. He didn't care about the rest of the blog, or anything else I've written, just one sentence about an ex…he was freaking. I didn't come home last night until well after he went to bed. I was so mad he broke his promise to me, and snooped on here, somehow he got onto my page..I think I'll have to make a stronger psw. he claimed it was up, which I know I closed it down..and out of all the blogs, why pick that one, he probably read more than that one,,,it's just reading about an ex, set him off. I understand why he is mad, and I don't blame him for that, but these are my thoughts, and it feels good to get them out of my head…he twisted and turned it and made it a horrible thing. I was freaking worried about him and his reaction to seeing an ex, but he didnt' see  that….so now it's the next day and I am refusing to talk to him. I don't trust I can write down my feelings and he won't read them…I'm not sure what to do..

our marriage is in jeapordy. Man, if I can't even own my own thoughts…what's left for me…he has taken everything else away from me..and trapped me where I can have no friends, can't go out, can't talk about certain things, I feel messed up right now…I hate life right now…but I will continue to go to school, and try to not let him screw that up for me too…I just don't know if I can continue on in a marriage where there is no trust anymore..not even enough that he won't read my thoughts, where he feels he can violate my privacey. Two effin years after the separation..I still feel the wrath… I don't know what I am going to do…