So I spent the evening speaking a young lady and the conversation was great. It felt good to just sit and talk. then the fear started to set in. of course I love meeting new ppl but the one thing I love about here is no-one know u know. She dont know my story and that makea me feel safe. it's funny cause I tried to limit information and then she started freaking out that she was being catfish cause I was hesitant about posting a pictures….little do she know my anxiety is out the window cause now she has a face to this person of the shadows. What if she gets curious and start searching for me and once found she dont like whats she found. I choose to leave in the closet with my demons. I see her demons trying to take her down but I dont want thia life for her cause all it does is lead to hidding. she has time to right her wrongs. she has time to turn a ugly situation into something beautiful and meaningful. She don't see her gem lays in her palm ready to be cut and shaped. I let mines get away and now im chasing it. I should have cut and shaped it while I had the chance. By Gem I mean life. love, family, trust,friendships, and honor. I pushed everyone because my scars was enough. life gave a beating that wasn't deserved. All it would have taken is one person to stop and lift me up. it would have made all the difference. we all have our struggles, our pain, our broken pieces but how many times have u said no one cares or im alone. Yet we walk past the next doing the same thing they done to us.Im fighting my own demons but I rather point her in the direction than to follow my to my closet of guilt.