A friend of mine suggested that I start keeping a journal to keep track of everything that's going on with me and how I'm dealing with all of this. It's a great plan and I think that this would be the perfect outlet for what I've been feeling lately.
The first thing to aderess would probably be that despite my ex sleeping around behind my back I still miss her, hell I love her even though in my mind I've already let her go. Unfortunately for me, the little red b*tch in my chest doesn't seem to want to get with the program. It's like half of the time I want to call her every filthy name I can think of while I'm trying to figure out what I did wrong. The other half is me remembering everything I loved about her. Not sure how to deal with all the extra stuff added on to it but I guess every one starts somewhere.
I'm still nervous about whatever she might have passed long to me. I don't know what to expect, which is probably why I'm so stressed and nervous I was on my way to getting my life together. I just got a new job a few days ago after months of internships and tons of interviews, resume revisions, and literally hours of mock interviews to get myself to this point. It's an accomplishment to be sure, it just sems sort of hollow right now.
On a brighter note I can finally sit down and relax when I get home. Before I got hired the bulk of my time was devoted to sifting through tons of career websites, Temp agencies, and emails just to find someone willing to give me a shot. Now after a long day out I can rest easy knowing that I'm actually achieving something with my life now.
I've tlked enough, thanks for reading this far if you managed to make it lol.