It's a hole — it's an ache — a longing — something is missing inside and out — an absence of touch — your heart is in the wrong place — so hard to give it words — so hard to explain — deep deepest pain — some say "Find fulfillment within and you will not feel lonely" — not buying sell it somewhere else — bullshit usually from those who have companionship.

Brushing past another shoulder in the same living place — hearing your name spoken by a voice you love — someone calling to you from another room "Lori, what do you want for supper?" "Don't matter baby, what do you feel like?" — comfortable rhythm of a day — air filled with their presence, their air, their fragrance — "It's your turn to do the dishes, remember." "Okay, I'll get em later." — it's just right, steady — a good place to be, they're there — "Hey, I'm gonna run to the store. You need anything?" "No baby, can't think of anything right now." "Be Careful." "I love you." "I love you too baby." "Come give me a kiss before you go." — tender, sweet— a pinch on the ass — "Ummm you smell good." "Thanks baby, be back in a little while." "Call me if you think of something."

Here's my little dog — furry warmth — some help — not the same — not a hand to hold — not a voice to hear — no smile to see to give a smile to.

Oh my god — too hard to think about — hurt is too much — "God I hate this, I hate it." — it's in my gut, it's in my throat — trapped one heart — where do I go — what difference does it make — God I wanta scream — "There it is again." "What?" "You know, IT." "Oh shit, I hate that fucker." "Who are you talking about?" "You know, that fucking WHY that always fucks with you." "He's always singing that song." "What song?" "You know that song…how does it go…it's right on the tip of my tongue." "Oh yeah, I know which one your talking about, yeah." "Doesn't it go something like……

One is the loneliest number, one is the loneliest number that you'll ever do…" "Yeah that's the fucking song."