So. I just joined this site, and I didn’t feel like posting a blog right after I did, because I was tired and bored and just out of it. I figure I might as well tell you my reasons for feeling like a totally worthless loser, if anybody actually cares, and see what happens.

Kay. So. First, I’m not exactly the most popular and beautiful and wonderful person. In fact I have maybe three friends, which are currently questionable as far as anything goes. I guess my people skills suck. Most of the time when I meet people my age, they just kinda stare at me funny, talk to me like I’m mentally handicapped, and try to avoid me when at all possible. Others like to talk behind my back when they think I don’t hear them.

I don’t know if I’d call myself ugly. I can’t say it fairly, because nobody really precieves themselves the way they really look. But I’m really tall for my age (mid teen) and just slightly overweight. With Acne. So I probably look hideous to all of the anorexic makeup abusing morons who seem to live everywhere and control everything.

I’m shy. Not really a get-up-and-show-off kind of person. I’m the ‘hey let’s just kind of start a conversation and chat about things…’ type of person who gets shoved aside every time she wants to say something and who nobody really wants to listen to anyway. I mean all I do is write novels and make videogames in my spare time… if it’s not dating and partying it’s not good enough, right?

So here’s the things that make me unhappy. I’m a writer, but I can’t write anything anymore. I’m sixteen and have never been complimented by a guy, been asked on a date, been kissed, or had a boyfriend. I had a job this past summer and my supervisor was mean to just me and my friend- telling us not to talk when the others were chatting away and then turning around and chatting it up with someone else herself. My brother is a game addict and my parents like to support him over me, to the point where any negative comment or suggestion I make about him whether he’s there or not gets me punished. My english teach is a bitch one minute and then helps me the next, and I have no idea what she expects on any of the assignments I have for her class and it’s stressing me out to no end. And I’m sure there are other things but I can’t think of them at the moment.

Except the way I invited my friends to see a movie tonight and they ditched me. So I got to sit in a row all alone… Although there were some guys who came and sat next to me- until one of them looked at me, then he nudged his buddies and they moved somewhere else.

^^ So yah! That’s why I’m unhappy.

I’m going to go cry now.

I hate my life.

1 Comment
  1. revealed65 13 years ago

    Hey,

    Actually, a lot of people here write blogs everyday and equally read others. As depressed as you get, people are very supportive of others, even if they aren”t supportive of themselves.

    I know what its like to be 16, with all those problems. Was there not too long ago actually, its been a couple of years since then. But i don”t think you should take it so deep to your heart if you don”t have a boyfriend or even been asked out. I mean, i”m sure your beautiful despite what you think. and plus, you are 16 years old! you shouldnt even expect to have all these things, as they will come to you once you get older. i know how you feel, and i hope you manage to cope with your depression, like everyone else. i know its easy for me to sit here and talk and talk, and tell you how to feel..because people always do that to me too. but than again, this is depression tribe, and we are in it together as tacky as that sounds. popularity, beauty and boyfriends are very superficial things that don”t really carry much meaning in life. i can bet that 90% of your friends won”t be around in the next couple on years or make any influence in your life – so why be so sad over them? who the hell cares if someone moves away from you in the movies to sit somewhere else? if i was there with you, i”d hand him back the stick that was stuck in his ass the whole time and give him some napkins on his trip to the next few seats so he can wipe the stupidity that spews out after. i hope you understand this. i know life is hard. i know. anyways, i hope you manage to rant more on these blogs. they help a lot! take care hun, and welcome to DT!

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