What starting out as a way to just get away, give my brain and my heart a break turned out to be so much more.  And so much worser than I could have imagined, even in my nightmares.  Parts were fun, omg lots of fun, learned a lot, saw lots of good and tons of bad.  Some things were scary, some funny, some painful.  I made some money and lost some money, guess that is what happens to girls like me.

I was feeling shut out, being put down and made to feel like shit, all by a girl who was supposed to be my partner, my love… I decided to say fuck it and run away.  If she dont want me, I’m sure I can find someone who does, and definitely find guys who would want to be with me and even pay to be with me.

I saw some really beautiful parts of the country and some parts that were less pretty. Had a job in Minneapolis for a bit over a week.  Learned that I kinda liked the feeling of drugs, but the feelings weren’t worth it.  I was forced to do things and some things were done cuz I was cool with it.  I decided to come home and while in Arizona, I worked out of a strip club for a few nights and one night, it was raining. I remember laffing, it’s the middle of summer and it’s raining.  Not cold rain, just chilly, but nice.  Next thing I know, I woke up in the hospital, cracked skull, dislocated jaw, messed up sholder, cracked ribs, black eyes.  Cops where assholes to me, cuz I couldn’t remember anything, I heard them talking to the dr outside the room thing i was in.  They fucking said I’m either a hooker, a runaway or homeless…so no humans were involved.  If she wants to talk, give us a call.  She won’t and she”ll be back out on the streets in a couple of days.

I’m finally back home, my head hurts all the time, still have nose bleeds, eyes don’t focus and they are vampire looking..

I fucking can’t handle this life, I need to do something different, but i have no skills, no i.d. and no references… Idk how to get out or what i want if I do.


I’ve been in the hospital for a few days…my g/f found me on the floor and my nose and ear was bleeding.  Guess I’ve been having seizures.  I hope to get out today or tomorrow.


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