I went in to a really bad depression when my guy friend killed him self with a gun. I find out the next day at school the he shot himslef. This guy friend that killed him self he was my ex boyfreind. We dated in milled school and in high school. One of my friends know that he had a gun and she did not tell anyone. It has been more  then a year since he passed away. My friend that know that he had the gun. Me and her are not friends any more because I could not stand her knowing that he had a gun and she did not stop him. Every so often i think if he was still here but really he is gone. I have not forgave my frined and I still bleam her because she could have stoped him. No she did nothing and that makes me mad. He had so munch to live for and know that is not going too happen because of what my friend did.. Is it mean to blame this all on her when she could have done something. I am not okay that she did not step up and say something. She could of saved his life. This guy was part of my life and we would talk a lot in milled school. I can’t belive that he is gone for good and that really hurts because I wanted to see my ex bf that passed away finsh school and go to the army and for him to live his dream. I think that I should live his drem but i don’t think that i can do that because i am not ready to face that he is reallly gone for good. I rember the day i found that he killed him slef i told my best friend that was like my sister that my ex bf killed him self . I went home and told my mother that my best freind killed himself. I was down and i am still dealing with his dealth and i am sort of having a hared time dealing with it. I have friends that i can talk to about how I feel…. I am doing a little bit batter i have a boyfriend that loves me. I am in my last year of high school. I just want to say that i like this site becasue people are willing to lestin to what you have to say and they can help you… I have a lot to battle and i found that you are not alone because sometimes i feel like no body will unrstand and people do care and that you are not alone and thire are poeple that do want to help you and you should let them help you.


1 Comment
  1. delane 4 years ago

    Brookey, ***HUGS*** i’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with this!
    Honestly, i don’t think it’s about blame, as much as trying to heal. (if that makes any sense) i’m glad you have some support in your life, and i know it can mean a lot, in the long-run.
    In life, we’re supposed to learn these hard lessons and heal and go on. Easier said than done! Something else to consider: life is choice driven—your ex made his own choice, and regardless of your friend’s inactivity, do you think it woulda made a huge difference? i’m just saying that if it was a suicide–which is what it sounds like–then i don’t think anyone’s to blame that’s still ‘here’…. If it was an accidental discharge, that’s something totally different.
    i can definitely understand your pain, hun. i just don’t seem to have the right words, right now, to really explain myself…. *sigh

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