I constantly feel unappreciated in my personal and personal life. As a result, I second guess myself and my abilities. It eats away at my confidence and deepens my depression.
The job I have right now is being an instructor at a college. It’s helping me pay for graduate school while giving me time to do my studies. But I absolutely hate it most days because it’s a lot of work with little reward. I always try my best to engage the students and be helpful but it feels like no one cares.
I made the mistake of checking myself on the rate my professor website. I’ve only gotten awful “reviews” from disgruntled students. I wish I could take my name off there because it’s embarrassing and mostly untrue. I know that I’ve helped some students but they aren’t the ones rating me. So it gives the appearance that I’m an awful teacher. For example, one student wrote that there was too much work and the tests were too hard. The thing is, I’m not in charge of the work load. I take direction from my superiors… Another student said that I didn’t answer my email and wasn’t available for office hours. Both are completely untrue.
These kids (by kids I mean 18yr olds) don’t seem to realize how difficult it was to switch to an online learning format. Additionally, I was dealing with taking my own classes so was only available by appointment. I just wish students would realize that their teachers are people too. Why do you have to smear someone’s name by writing a bad review? I know I’m not a bad teacher but it hurts to read these comments. It makes me regret ever taking the job. I hate feeling like this.