We need to know how far we'll go, and how far we'll allow others to go
with us. Once we understand this, we can go anywhere.
When we own our power to take care of ourselves — set a boundary, say no, and
change an old pattern — we may get flack from some people. That's okay. We
don't have to let their reactions control us, stop us, or influence our decision
to take care of ourselves.
We don't have to control their reactions to our process of self-care. That is
not our responsibility. We don't have to expect them not to react either.
People will react when we do things differently or take assertive action to
nurture ourselves, particularly if our decision in some way affects them. Let
them have their feelings. Let them have their reactions. But continue on your
course anyway.
If people are used to us behaving in a certain way, they'll attempt to
convince us to stay that way to avoid changing the system. If people are used to
us saying yes all the time, they may start mumbling and murmuring when we say
no. If people are used to us taking care of their responsibilities, feelings,
and problems, they may give us some flack when we stop. That's normal. We can
learn to live with a little flack in the name of healthy self-care. Not abuse,
mind you, flack.
If people are used to controlling us through guilt, bullying, and badgering,
they may intensify their efforts when we change and refuse to be controlled.
That's okay. That's flack too.
We don't have to let flack pull us back into old ways if we've decided we want
and need to change. We don't have to react to flack or give it much attention.
It doesn't deserve it. It will die down.
Today, I will disregard any flack I receive for changing my behaviors or
making other efforts to be myself.:tongue: