Why? Oh why do people keep trying to get me to go to bingo. I went once a while back and it was boring, until I won some money, then it was boring again. I don't like it, but I know many people actually make a living on it, so that's good for them and I don't knock them for liking/going go bingo. Me, I don't like it and probably never will. I can't sit still for hours and just dot papers, hoping I win some money. It's just … not fun to me. I would rather read, watch a movie, or even take a walk and think, but not play bingo. My sister was who was trying to get me to go, then she calls my mom, at work. and is like, 'Mom, make her come to bingo with me. She needs to go somewhere.' I wanted to say, I went somewhere yesterday and I'm still not over that, but I said nothing because no one can make me go and do something I don't want to do. Of course, my mom is like, 'If you can get her to go, fine. Stop calling me at work about stupid stuff.' My sister then looks at me funny because I'm looking pretty smug, knowing my mom could care less if I go to bingo or not. Bingo isn't really her type of thing, either.

So, my sister starts getting dressed and is basically talking to herself because I'm not really listening. 'I don't know why you won't go anywhere. It's crazy.' And then she kept on about that. I tuned it out. I'm not crazy just because I don't want to go to bingo. Lots of people don't go and they're not crazy. Well, maybe they are, but not going to bingo isn't a reason they're crazy.

She left about an hour ago and I have to say that I did have a fleeting moment of wanting to go, but that stopped. I'm still in my depressed state, so I just went and ate two cookies while standing in front of the open fridge. I tend to either eat a lot or not eat at all when I'm depressed. Once (maybe about three months ago) I didn't really eat for almost two weeks and lost twenty pounds. I was happy, but my mom got all crazy thinking I'd developed an eating disorder or was trying to. I'm not stupid. I know that having a eating disorder is hard and I'm happy I don't have one. I wouldn't 'try' to get one either. To me, that's like a slap in the face to people who do have them and are trying hard to recover from them. But she thinks I don't think like that because I'm too young to understand complex things in life. Please, I'm the one who usually gives her and my older sister advice, which they don't listen to most of the time, and are too high and mighty to say that I was right. It'd be like admitting that I may just have a better grasp of life then they do. I'm not trying to say I'm better or more experienced than them, but I tend to look outside the box and see things in a deeper way then they do.

Oh, well, let me finish watching my movie and lay down.



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