A couple months ago I decided to get tested for HIV and HEP C, my results came back HIV positive and HEP C negative, my boyfriend at the time and still is to this day is the one that gave me the HIV,he used to be really big into meth and sharing needles and all that,we used to use a condom but one day all the condoms we used broke,then he kind of pressured me into not using them at all,at first i resisted then I had a F**k it attitude and thought well ifI have anything I have it now. Before I ever got tested he never told me he kinda figured he had something,he also refused to get tested he never wanted to know his status knowing he probably had HIV cause of the fact of sharing needles. Now I dont know if I should be angry at him,I find myself feeling like he was being selfish because he refused to get tested but yet wanted to have unprotected sex with me(to be closer to me as he says)I dont know if I have the right to be sore at him or not,cause it was my choice also to let him pressure me into not using protection,I just thought i could trust him. was he being selfish and only thinking of himself?
After telling him that he gave me HIV he decided to get tested so I wasnt alone in this.he has both HIV and HEP C.I know HEP C is harder to get through intercourse,I know its transmitted from blood to blood and all that,but im still scared to get that also,I dont need anything more. but he still refuses to use protection and I'm scared to ask him to. I just need an outsiders opinion on my situation,I dont really have anyone to talk to about all this,my mother passed almost a year ago,and my dad doesnt really talk to me anymore after knowing my status and im an only child. I feel so alone with no one to talk to,and its not like I can talk to my boyfriend about whats going on in my head,hes always in denial about everything.