I guess I assumed one day I would just become happy I would not have to be on meds or go the thearpy but, the day never came. I am currently taking zoloft a very low dose I do ok most days but, having a really hard time finding a job here in california and very hard time paying bills. It is like iif it is not one problem there is another. I am a mother of a three year old and marriend and, to be honest whish I never had children I can’t do shit for him he does not even have his own room we all shar a one bed room apartment and I am sick of it. Sometimes I think it would be better if I gave my son to somone who can afford him it is breaking us so much but, my husband is ok with having nothing I mean we have food we have shelter clean cloths etc but no extras at all. I am so tried of being broke I could being a escort or a dnacer at this point only if I was not too fat lol . I can’t find a job in my field I am currently going to school but, far away from my degree my husband makes nothing without my income he is not even makinf 45% of what I was making I fell liek such a loser I swear. We have no support system both of our families are not well off and can’t help us at all have been on my own since I was 15 and freakign sick and tried of having money problems. I swear people say if you were rich you would still not be happy if you are not happy while tyou are poor well thats bullshit when I was making good $$$ I was happy I hate being a loswer I guess God does not want me to amount to who I want to be I guess I don’t deserve anything better than what I have since, something always seems to happened to take away everythign we have. I am so sick of living I really am if it was not for my husband I would just go be homeless and go shoot myself in the head I swear I am so over beign alive.
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As We Move Forward
Diana, , Depression, Anger, Borderline Personality Disorder, Child, Depression, Grief, Suicide, 0
I’ve never been the prettiest, or the smartest. I’ve been called the nicest, but too often it’s just an...
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Surviving
totaldarkness, , Depression, Depression, Medication, 0
Another weekend has passed. Another two days i made it without medications. I find myself thinking more clearly when...
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There is still a bit more down to this roller coaster
Steph_jn, , Depression, Career, Child, Sleep Disorders, 0
LoL Everytime I think that the worst has happened and things will start looking up…… Yesterday my husband lost...
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The part of me that is not physical
HoodooHarry, , Depression, Anxiety, 0
I am increasingly aware that there is a part of my being that is not physical. It is not...
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Anxiety sucks
PsychologyDude, , Anxiety, Depression, Anxiety, Suicide, Therapy, Weight Loss, 2
Last October I had a serious suicide attempt, which required an open heart surgery to mend, along with some...
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Being Female Sometimes Sucks
Nessie26, , Depression, Anxiety, Child, Questions, Relationships, Sex Therapy, 2
I finally went to the Dr… unfortuanatly, in doing so, secrets came out and my mother lost even more...
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Functional Human Being
Sarina_Luna94, , Depression, Depression, Therapist, 0
Everyday gets a little easier to live with, my nightmares are more spaced out rather than four or six...
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Rip Jules
Destiny_Smith, , Depression, Anxiety, Depression, OCD, Sleep Disorders, Suicide, 0
So I didn't know where to put this… So I'm putting it here…. So here goes…. On january 21st...