My boyfriend left me after 9 years, my family uses me as their personal atm and I work and live in a very small town away from my friends, who by the way are all happily engaged, married or pregnant. Every time they look at me I see pity, they tell me that my time will come eventually but I can't see it the same way.Lately, everything seems to be going wrong, my ex is now happy with his new girlfriemd and lives what I wanted from him for years. he works less, takes care of her kid, is always there for her. i wanted kids, instead he fell out of love with me, I guess it is because I gained weight, his new gf is a thin version of me. I gave everything to him, to my family and to what end? That I'm alone, unhappy and sad at home.Today, I took my friends to the airport,they live in Utah and have been to Germany for a visit, it was nice to see them again, but they are gone now, it leaves a hole behind, I feel as if I have no other purpose than to go to work and sometimes meet with my friends from time to time. I'm glad to have such loving and wonderful friends, but coming home to an empty appartment makes me feel so alone. It is hard to see the good things in life, I know I should be angry, instead I am still accomodating, I should be content, but I want more.I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm trying to date but there hasn't been one guy I actually like. It's like I am boycotting myself, although I feel that I shouldn't settle for a guy just because I am lonely. What can I do? Just wait until things will be better? What if it never happens?