It seems a common theme for me this year has been rejection, and handling it. Although I've made a lot of strides in dealing with my self-esteem and insecurities, I know I have a long way to go, and it only gets worse when things don't work out for me.

My year can be summed up as such largely in relationships, but also in my career. Obviously, I made this profile because I was dealing with the parting of a woman I had loved for 6 years, which hurt a lot. Then in my attempts to date, it seems like I was making poor choices, settling for people I felt safe dating but wasn't interested in, and then after that, I've been hurt several times putting myself out there trying to date.

I'm not sure if it's the rejection that hurts or not knowing WHY so I can learn from it. Am I not attractive in some fixable wa? I feel like I'm decent looking, and I take women out, pay for the date, smile, make eye contact, make conversation, and I have my life together on paper (job, car, place to live, etc). Yet it always seems it's "Oh I'm too busy to go out sorry" or "Sorry but I just don't think we'd make a good match" and I'm left bashing my head into the wall. Even when I ask flat out what I did…I get no answer or "Nothing you did was wrong, you're fine"

If I'm not doing anything wrong, why am I sitting in bed crying, hurt and lonely? Not like I'm obsessed with finding a partner, but sometimes being alone gets to be a bit much, and I feel like since I have the rest of my life together, I should be in a position people would at least want my company.