They say that dreams are your minds way of telling you things, but I'm not sure what mines trying to say.. I'm in a elevator and I'm not sure where I am until I step out.. and the smells and the sound hit me all at once, I'm in a hospital I'm not sure exactly what I'm doing but my feet carry me to a room with soft cries and a smell of suffering. My feet take me further in but my heart is racing and i'm scared.. Then I feel something in my hand It's a needle but what is the purpose of it.. And then I hear it, the voice that is so familar to the memories locked inside my head, it's the voice of a lost father, a father that would have wandering hands in the middle of the night , a father that would tell me how beautiful I was and how much he loved me.This voice I thought I would never hear again, but there it is and It's calling my name and my feet start moivng again.. Now I'm standing over the bed with the needle in my hand… He looks up at me his eyes wide, and everything he did replays in his eyes. Memories that I convinced my self weren't true flash in front of my eyes. my head begins to hurt my body begins to tremble these aren't my memories this can't be me.Things like this don't happen to little girls, little girls that are good to thier fathers and listen to their mothers words, but that's me I see it in his eyes me calling out daddy as he reaches for my thigh.. Then the needle makes sense, his eyes go black and the next thing I know I'm yelling at him telling him to say it, say it I yell.. He begins to cry and say's he's sorry, but I'm not happy Instead I become angry, but my heart is saying to forgive him, I'm angry and I'm yelling and the needle, I want it in his arm and I lower it, He calls my name and the next thing I know I wake up and I'm not mad, I'm not angry I'm crying and I feel as if I've lost something, but I'm not sure what it is.
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Invisible
sadviolinist, , Depression, Bipolar, Sleep Disorders, 1
Today has been difficult emotionally. I feel really "blah" and I'm also frightened because I can feel thedepression creeping...
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Meh
Poisontongue, , Depression, Medication, 0
I'm still here, I just thought I hadn't had any comments in the past… 3 months or so. Damn...
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Understanding and Accepting
Aloe7072, , Depression, LGBT, Teens, Depression, Domestic Abuse, Sex Therapy, 0
~ Please be patient because this is my first time doing this. I’m sorry to the actually bloggers because...
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Why does it happen so quickly?
flame, , Depression, Depression, Medication, 0
Why can I be happy one moment and so down the next? What the hell is wrong with my...
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Up and Rock-bottom
downey491, , Depression, Career, Medication, 0
Things were going so well. I was feeling a little better despite the medication change and I had put...
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Trying
Bee20, , Depression, Anger, Anxiety, Depression, Medication, Questions, Relationships, Sleep Disorders, Weight Loss, 1
I decided today that I need to reach out and try to find people like me. In my daily...
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Tired of Being Tired!
sadviolinist, , Depression, Sleep Disorders, Weight Loss, 1
Feeling kind of weird today. Feeling feisty, up, but still down. I'm really confused. I don't normally have mixed...
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day 4
Cautrell05, , Depression, 0
Hey guys day 4. My mood was really bad.I’m super stresssed out. Sorry that this blog is kinda short