Hello folks. Here I am with another one of my family rants. Sometimes families can get to you in ways you never even thought of. I just love it when you can be in the same cramped space and they talk to each other as if you aren’t even there. Or when you say something they tell you is isn’t something you needed but something you wanted, even when they have no clue as to what they are talking about. It just amazes me how my family still thinks of me in one way and that is it. I am about ready to tell some of them I am not in their life and I don’t tell them what to do, I might make suggestions that they can take or leave, but I don’t go in and tell them you have to do this, that or the other. Especially when they are talking about stuff they have absolutely no freaking clue about. I just grin and bear it and don’t say a word cause it won’t get me anywhere right now, but someday they will get a clue when I tell them the clue. I am living my own life now and they seem to forget that, but one of these days they will either get it or I will have to tell them that I am living my own life and they don’t know what is going on it as they think they know. I don’t think they get it I see more than what they might think, sometimes, but I do and they need to get it that I am not exactly the person who I was at one time. One of these days they will push the wrong button and I will just politely get up and leave without saying a word and they probably won’t understand why I do it. Only time will tell if it comes to that or not.
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Friends are the family we choose. Family is that group of people you (probably) wouldn't normally even say boo to, but are somehow tied to. And, I might add, against your will. (You didn't ask to be born, did you?) Take them with a grain of salt. They don't know who you really are… and maybe they have no interest in getting to know the real you. Maybe they already have an idea of who they think you should be/what you should be doing firmly and nothing/no one will change their mind.
That said… I think you SHOULD speak up. As calmly and rationally as your frustration allows (because blowing up will just prove their point – that you're irrational and somehow flawed and need their wisdom to help you live your life).
Keeping it all in solves nothing. Maybe it gets you through that one get-together, but it is only postponing the innevitable. One day, at some future gathering, you're going to have the wrong buttons pushed. And it will be as much your fault for not speaking up when you had the chance, as it will be theirs for continuing to push. Hell, they may not even realize they're pushing buttons – maybe they're just obnoxious. But you have to speak up and establish your boundaries now, before they drive you so nuts that you throw food at them.