I haven't posted on here lately because I've been feeling pretty good. I did have one little incident I wanted to tell you guys about, but other than that, things have been okay here, mostly just counting down the days to my graduation.

A few weeks ago I had a serious panic attack because I thought I wouldn't be able to walk at graduation due to my grades. So I ended up crying infront of the secretary in the Earth Sciences department, and she called the campus therapy and scheduled an appointment for me to go talk to them. I have a therapist I pay for already but I thought it wouldn't hurt.

Well, when I went to the lady, she immediately scolded me for seeing two therapists at once (which was not my intention, I just needed someone to talk to at the time), and then skimmed the subject I wanted to talk about for something else. She asked me repeatedly about my sexuality (actually, she assumed I was bisexual), and when I told her that I am asexual (I don't really have interests in men or women), she judged me and said that was like being in the same category as being a child molester.

Pardon my language here but I fucking hate being stereotyped as a horny man who would stoop so low as to rape children when he can't get sex from a woman. Is it wrong that I'd rather get to know a woman rather than walk up to one at a bar and say something stupid like "Hey baby, want to come over to my house and have sex?"? Is it wrong that I don't fit into your stereotypical category of a sex-craved man?

Well anyway, she recommended that I try to go to bars and parties and try to hit on a woman since "that's what normal guys are supposed to do your age". I don't ever intend to do anything like that, nor will I ever go back to the on-campus therapists again. When I talked to my real therapist about this, she was really appalled that this lady would go to that level on the first session, and said she was not professional at all and did not cover what I was there for.

Anyway, enough with that rant. Here's a few other, more positive updates from me: I'm going to take a test for precalculus next week, and if I pass it, then I pass the class. I'm currently failing precalculus because the teacher is ridiculously hard and quite frankly does not know how to teach the class (there are currently 9 students left in her class out of the original 40-ish, and only half are passing). Also I'm almost all set for my summer class, which I am going to take at another school since the math department here is so terrible. I'm pretty excited, although I'll be driving to a neighboring county instead of being local.

Lastly, I'll have a nice weekend since my mom and brother are taking a trip to visit my bro's fiancee to talk about their wedding in October. I'll have the house to myself from tomorrow until Monday. The only downside is that I will be home alone for Easter, but my grandparents have offered to take me out to lunch after church, so it won't be all that bad. I've got a few things school-related I have to do but otherwise I'll get to relax this weekend.

So that's mostly it for me as of right now. May 14th is coming soon, and once I walk it should hopefully be the last thing I ever do at this college. I'll finally be able to move on to a better life.

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One more thing –  For anyone who meditates or practices Buddhism, I have a website to recommend for you.  A Buddhist monk that I really like named Thich Nhat Hanh (often called Thay) has a website where his teachings and meditation sessions are broadcast.  I actually got to watch a live recording of one of his sessions last night, and it was pretty amazing actually getting to hear his own voice speaking about the Buddha's teachings.  Here's the website – http://pvom.org/

Also I recommend reading some of his books if you ever get the chance.  The one I am reading right now is called Living Buddha, Living Christ, and really points out the similarities between Buddhism and Christianity.  It's pretty amazing and I am really moved by his wisdom.