Well its been 12 weeks dating D., and I am left questioning, wondering, and a little baffled. He and I have had so much fun, yes, here it comes….but, there are questionable things like at his mom's home who passed and now is his brothers home is a wedding picture of him and his x- wife sitting next to the bed we share when we're there, it's been 4 yrs. since the divorce, just in case you were wondering, anyway he looks at it often, before going to sleep, in the morning lying there, and when we go to leave, he even handed it to me to look at, is this wierd or is it just me? There are also wedding picture of them else where in the house, for example under the coffee table, yep you read correctly, under the coffee table. Also a little more infomation, they are still close friends. K, another thing is he had told me in the beginning of us dating he hadn't had a relationship with anyone, but he had, a woman with 2 children, actually lived with him on and off for 2 yrs., she was 30 and he's 51 yrs. old, he did alot for this woman and she left him for his nephew, lol! He also is still online chatting up other woman, but has requested we be exclusive, and has told me he loves me, and calls me his girlfriend ,and has taken me to meet his family, soooo what do you guys make of all these issues? Another thing the real heart of the matter is he recently was laid off his job and I have been extremely supportive of him offering many things to help him, anyway through it all are lapses of time where I'm not hearing from him like today and lastnight he gmailed me a very brief message, text was talking about the"girls" how my day was, and goodnight, I just don't feel a mental connection with him, there just isn't enough communication in this for me. I love the fact he says how much he enjoys my look, my physical self but sometimes I feel that's all there is. If he's not conversing with me whom is he conversing with? I suppose cutting through some of the jibber, I'm just worried that I won't be able to have a bond other than the physical which will be devestating for me. What we have here is a serious failure to communicate…………I can communicate, but it doesn't work if your not interested……..
Lack Of Communication
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Hi Di.Wow Im so disappointed to hear this person is like this!Im sorry to say this di,but please step back a little from D.There is nothing wrong with holding memories from the past but thisis outright strange.I thought this person sounded great when you first started talking about him,now Im not so sure.Now i dont want to upset you because you deserve happiness in buckets after wht you have been through but if a person just talks about you as a physical entity only,and you dont feel any other human connection,well,they may be just using you for their fun and because they are lonely.Sure,give him a chance but be aware,be on your guard and if you feel maybe this isnt going to give you the nourishment we all need in a relationship,dont be scared to maybe walk away.
Dont let him use you Di,be honest with what you would like from the relationship,and if he cant deliver,see ya later buddy( to him).we deserve nothing but top shelf when it comes to intimate relationships,no matter how down we feel as a person in our depression.
Now you take care of yourself and know these words I say ,I say because I dont want a nice gentle person like you hurt and abused.Im not saying he will do that ,just keep your intuition on high alert,it wont fail you.
Seeya Di,
Flowermantis x