I really dont know where to start. My life lately has been such a disappointment to me. My husband has a gambeling problem which he doesnt want to admit to or face. I thought maybe that if I would go with him we could gamble a little and then I could get him to leave but that wasnt the case. And with me going we ended up spending more money that we dont have. And my husband still goes gambeling without me. When he doesnt have money to gamble then he thinks in reality for example he says that he knows that he should leave at a certain point when he is gambling and how we should spend our money rather than gamble but when he has money in hand all that goes out the window. My son aks why dont i just tell him that he cant have any of my money when i have some but I cant tell him no! I just checked my bank account because he wanted to use my bank card to get some cigarettes and found out that he has overdrafted my account by $100. We recently filed bankrupcty and it seems like we are on our way back in debt. It is like God is looking down on me and saying I dont want things to go right in your life I want you to stay depressed or rather Im gonna let the devil keep racking havoc in your life because yall dont deserve to be happy. I know that life wasnt going to be easy but it seems like I have never except as a child had a time in my life where i didnt have to wait for the shoe to drop! I want to be excited for next year but if it is anything like this year why even participate?
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*le sigh*
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thank you Jasper867 for your reply. I have come to realize that this situation is out of my control and that i have to hand that as well as some other things over to God and i know that there is no problem or situation to big for God. I have also realized that for this new year (2013) that I have to change my thought process and that my thoughts are under my control. A lot of my problem is that I have been defeated even before I wake up in the mornings because of the way that I had been thinking and that I have to learn to appreciate what I have more than concentrate on what I dont have as a example. I have to take care of me and my son I cant control a full grown person and what they do. I will continue to pray about my husband and I know that in God's own time something will be done about it whether good or bad I just pray that God gives me the strength to endure. Your words were an encouragement and you are in my prayers. thank you!