I don't know what is wrong with me. I have a great relationship with this guy and I mentally am messing it up. I am paranoid and mentally unstable when it comes to the relationship. I can't understand why we don't see each other constantly. I can't understand why he says he misses me but won't see me more. I can't understand why he tells me he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me but doesn't see me more than once a week. I can't understand why we are I the honeymoon stage of our relationship and our sex life went from 4 times a night to maybe once. I feel he is not attracted to me. I feel that since we met I gained weight and that caused the decline in our sex life. He's says that is so far from true but in my mind it is true. I can't understand why he can't make plans in advance. I can't understand anything. It's like I am doing what I always do and am trying to make problems so I can be alone and sad. I need to fix this issue I have and don't know how. I want to know how to be in a normal relationship. I want to be normal and not paranoid. I want to understand what it is like to allow someone to truly love you. I want to be able to feel happy every day even when my love is not with me. I don't know how to do this. Is there classes or a book out there to help this type of problem. I need help. I need help badly. I don't want to acre this relationship up and I am slowly. Just like I did all the rest. Why did I end up with a brain that works this way. Why me??????
Suck at relationship
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Worst Week
deidrexx, , Depression, Anger, Anxiety, Depression, Medication, Obesity, Sleep Disorders, 0
This has been the worst fucking week. First the shit on Monday then last night. To top it off,It's...
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11/29/21
james114, , Anxiety, Depression, Teens, Anxiety, Infidelity, Obesity, Relationships, Weight Loss, 0
Well, today was both absolute shit and very positive. Let me explain. I’ve been dating this girl, let’s call...
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If you can''t do it…fake it
bummer, , Depression, Depression, Weight Loss, 1
My day started fairly poorly, as I mentioned in an earlier blog. After the application of the balms of...
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Life sucks
life_sucks, , Depression, Career, Depression, Grief, 0
are you one of those people for whom nothing in life ever works out ??- well join the club...
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Like I never was here
LonelyFemaleForever, , Depression, Anxiety, Child, Depression, Grief, Questions, Religion, 1
I know I might have many years to live still but I also know I could die at any...
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Elementary Years
Shawtyname, , Anxiety, Depression, Child, Divorce, Domestic Abuse, Grief, Relationships, Self Esteem, Sleep Disorders, 0
In my early years, I was forced to grow up fast. At the age of 8, I was raped...
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No Sleep For Me
soullessbvblover, , Depression, Anxiety, Schizophrenia, Sleep Disorders, 0
So it's about 3:55am at the moment. and no sleep. I'm tired but can't sleep. this always happens though...
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Blah
Di, , Depression, Anger, Child, Domestic Abuse, Relationships, Sex Therapy, Sexual Abuse, 0
HereI am again….. hanging on to really nothing, I feel strange, devoid of the world around me, but earlierI...


For me, I had to work on my insecurities because they can be really strong at times, part of that means taking responsibility for your own emotions and not relying so much on others emotions for yourself to be okay. That doesn’t mean you can’t love strongly, but taking a step back once in awhile and not rushing them, being able to take a look at yourself and think rationally about them is a good thing. It’s not easy by a long shot but I think being able to recognize your insecurities and when you feel this way so you can deal with it is a start. If you don’t have a therapist maybe that would be a good idea for you?