I'm trying to this website for the first time so I am little bit nervous. So here it goes….

I have been diagnosed with OCD since I was 15 after a family tragedy. I tried that luvoxamine, which sort of helped, but not really. I quit the medication after trying it for a 1 year and a half. I entered college and it was fun for the most part, but really busy. Yet, I couldn't shake the OCD thoughts that involved not trusting people especially when they were behind me especially in line. I had these thougths that they were sexual predators behind me or they were throwing things behind me. I think this stemmed from being afraid I was going to sexually assaulted from hearing too many stories about young children being sexually molested by adults and from being bullied when I was in grammar school and high school.

But three weeks ago, things in my life changed for the better. Last year, I had a nervous breakdown about school, but this year I had a roomate who experienced a very similar childhood tragedy I had experienced. In that sharing of experience, I began to realize how much I had hated myself and thought I was no good and a perfectionist. I belief this had stemmed from the tragedy, where I still took responsibility for the death of my little brother, which I had no control over. In essence, I was constantly overcompensating for many things due to my grief.

With that new perspective, I went on a spending spree and buying things that I thought were useful. I rang up more than $2,000 on my credit card. This soon gained the attention of my parents especially when I started to become invovled in government conspiracies and became worried about the sequester. So in response, my parents took me out of school, I have been recently out of a psych ward, and right now I'm taking zeprexa, which has helped, but I'am starting to feel its taxing side effects and planning to lower the disage of this medication I'm taking as I don't feel its helping me anymore.

I joined this site so I can make new friends as I am currently staying with my parents and I'am starting to feel lonely and isolated from my college friends.

So if anyone want's to chat with me, please do so! I don't bite, jk!