ALCHOLHOL
Current mood: annoyed
Category: Life

Dear Al,

I want you to know that I have wanted to write to you for a long time.  I am taking this opportunity to let you know that I do not intend to contact you again. 

When I first met you I did not realize how abusive you were. You looked so good! You always presented yourself in a most attractive way. Colorful, sometimes carrying an umbrella, and always bearing fruit.  You were so sweet and Oh! SO cool!  You even smelled good!  However, as the years went by you began to abuse me.  You hurt my head and my stomach.  I often woke up with bruises on my body.  I couldn't' remember what you had done to me the night before.  For years you kept abusing me and I kept taking it. You were no longer cool. You became bitter and hard. You began to dress in faded brown paper.  I was desperate.  I felt ashamed. I wanted to die. You made me hurt my body, family and friends. 

I did things they never thought I would do.  I even tried to kill myself.  You told me that I was a bad person, not worthy of kindness, forgiveness, or love. You said that I was stupid and would never be able to live without you.

Then one day, I went to a Magic Mountain* and began a journey that changed my life.  I learned that I could live without you.  There were people on the mountain who helped me understand that you lied to me. I am not stupid.  I am a good person and deserve to be loved.

As I learn more about you – I began to feel better about myself.

I know that you will visit me in the middle of the night or on a beautiful day at the beach.  Perhaps on my way to church.  You will whisper in my ear "You'll be back. You'll be back."  I will hear your voice, but I will not believe your lies.  I will surround myself with people who are familiar with the tricks you will use to gain control of me again.  I will talk with them every day.  I will reach out to my family and friends.  I will give them hugs and I will accept theirs.  I will remind myself that I have been given gifts from a power greater than myself.  I will pray and meditate and I will get healthy one day at a time.

I know you will miss me Al, but rest assured I will not miss you!