Most of you know, that I haven't been to work for almost three months because of my anxiety and the deep depression that I was in. I am overcoming that everday, and I have been a little stressed not having a job, but I am going to school which I am so thankful for.
I recieved a phone call yesterday from my former supervisor at the job I was last at. Mind you, I worked there for over two years and I loved the job, although at the time when my grandparents passed, I didn't mourn properly and "escaped" at work. I worked from home for four months with that company which was great, although I was working split shifts at the time, which was horrible. It felt as though I was working 24 hours and not to mention I was working Way too much over time. But anyways… about the phone call.
The company wants me back, and my supervisor offered me to work part time so I can still go to school. I am totally excited! Especially of how the economy is, it's hard to find a job, and I want to go back to work so bad! I feel that I can go back to work and work like I used to. I have accepted the death's of my grandparents and I have nothing to hide anymore. Although I am a bit nervous because I don't want to take a step backwards. I don't think that I will but I am sure that it's normal to feel this way, and I know that I will feel good about going back to work, especially to a company that i enjoy working for. I took the offer. And i will be working from home again. I am excited! The thing that's great is I can work part time, and there's no more split shifts which is awesome!
I just need to keep thinking positive. I have had a roller coaster life for the passed 10 months trying to find myself after I accepted the deaths of my grandparents. That's the most difficult thing to go through, sometimes, I felt as though I lost part of me, but I know that I have to keep going and I can do things on my own and I have to realize that I am starting My life, and it feels good! I am proud of myself especially from the phone call, that's very nice that they called me and offered a job!!!
I just need that reassurance from others that I will be okay. Which I believe I will. Sometimes staying positive seems hard, but I will do whatever it takes to stay positive about this! I am nervous if it will bring back old habits, but I don't see why it will. I have come a long way and fought through my depression, panic attacks. I still have a little anxiety but I know everything won't go away at once. But I am so thankful right now and I feel pretty dang good!