It sucks to be your own worst enemy and I’m sorry your going through this. I can’t say it’ll go away. Or even get better. Noone wants to feel like a burden, but unless your friends tell you they don’t want to talk about it or you’re burdoning them, I’d be willing to bet they would at least keep you company or help distract you. If not, find new friends immediately!! Just stopping in to say you’re not alone (not that that really makes it better, right? Like…great! So happy others are suffering too!) But what not being alone DOES mean, is that there’s more power behind finding a way to cope and maybe even have this ability to overthink work in your favor somehow. We don’t have the science and technology to map individual brain chemicals, but there are resources available to cope and the stigma is slowly lifting. It’s hard to be your own cheerleader, especially when you get that far down in the drain, so I’m cheering for you. Life is hard and unfair and I don’t think adults who came before us could have ever prepped us for all of the emotions and thoughts and pressure and stress and stigma and hate the world has to give. I’m rooting for you and it’s ok to give yourself grace!!