Growing up my family was never financially stable. I lived in a single parent home with brothers and sisters. Things were never easy for my mom, my siblings and I never had the best of everything. A few times we were evicted from our apartments and were forced to find a new place today. Although now I am on my own and working full time, I am also a college student with a lot of expenses. I feel like my finances are the biggest cause of my stress. Every day at least three times I am calculating about how much my check is going to be, and what bills I can pay. The anxiety shouldn't be there because I am extremely good with finances and my bills are always paid on time. However, I always fear that I’m not going to have enough money for this or that, or what happens if my car breaks down. I am always worried that some kind of miscellaneous expense is going to pop up and I won't have the money. (I have a lot of medical bills I am currently trying to pay off.) My biggest problem is never wanting to spend money on myself. Although the last few weeks I have been working overtime, I always feel guilty when I purchase something for myself. (even if it’s small). I always think that 20 dollars could have gone to a medical bill or a savings account.

I decided I don't want to be this fearful person anymore. It is not worth it. I have decided to allow myself to only calculate my paychecks when it is getting close to payday. Then I can calculate what bills I need to pay. I have also decided that any overtime I work will not go to bills. That money will be spent on me. A nice treat for a job well done. The monthly bills are always paid on time and as long as I pay something on my medical bills I should be able to spend extra money on myself. (I will save some too)! I believe I recently lost 15lbs and so the overtime on this paycheck will go towards new clothes. I enjoy reward systems.

I hope that by splurging occasionally I will not become anxious about my other bills. I need to nip this fear in the butt. I know with this economy I am not the only one struggling with finances. Any other suggestion?

Toodles,

Ashley

2 Comments
  1. Mo 10 years ago

    I have no suggestions; just wanted to compliment you on confronting your fear and CHANGING. It\'s the hardest thing yet WE are the only ones who can do it for ourselves to make a better life.

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  2. calm49 10 years ago

    It ok to be Anxous about your money. I lost job back in 2009 . i BOUGHT A NEW CAR BEFORE GOT LAID -OFF. i WORRY ABOUT THE RENT, AND THE CAR PAYMENT. bUT ANXIETY can be helpful.It keep us on top of things your on the right path your challeging your Disorted thinking, which is Over Generizing and Enlarging . Stay on the path . Rember take Baby Steps.

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