I just want to say: really if people considered someone to have destroyed \’this whole site\’ as it\’s been said, with certain blogs, then really they shouldn\’t be adding to that perceived destruction by filling it up with more blogs ranting about that person and announcing that they\’re leaving the site, and turning this whole thing into a giant fight when it wasn\’t meant to be such a thing. [br][br]Really, the thing this episode reminds me of is a book I\’ve been attempting to finish writing for some years now, where the basic premise is people\’s inability to talk to each other in any straightforward way.  Rather than messaging a person and saying, \’I don\’t like what you said,\’ and discussing it together and reaching the mutual understanding that one person didn\’t mean any genuine harm and was just joking, and the other person didn\’t find the joke funny and actually found it offensive, and thereby reaching a conclusion of \’to each his own\’ and moving on in life, we choose to bombard and attack.[br][br]And not just attack – pronounce and announce.  We decide to leave a website because of something we\’re actually adding to, ourselves, without looking at it.  That\’s really what I just saw happen.  It seems a common human error that occurs again and again and again, and I\’d really go so far as to say it\’s THE human problem.  [br][br]Talk.  Can\’t we just talk?  Can\’t we be adults and recognise that we\’re not all the same, we don\’t all think or speak the same way, we don\’t all have the same sense of humour, but we also aren\’t all mean-spirited evil people?  Because really, we don\’t and we aren\’t.  And the only way any of us are going to realise such a thing is through practise – practise at just letting things go.  Or speaking to each other like equals, instead of splitting into teams and jumping on the bandwagon without knowing all the facts, or the people.[br][br]As someone with Borderline Personality Disorder, this holds more weight for me than you might guess.  I see things in black and white all too often.  I read something someone says, I instantly jump to a conclusion about it, pass judgment, feel this terrible need to act on it, and often the urge to cut myself off completely and never speak to someone again as long as I live.[br][br]And guess what?  Some time passes and I learn all the facts, learn more about the person, and I realise I misjudged them and I feel embarrassed about my behaviour, and by then it\’s usually too late and I\’ve really hurt or offended someone by being so hostile toward them and swearing them off for life.[br][br]This just isn\’t the way to communicate.  It\’s the isolationist way, and I think that defeats the whole purpose of being involved in a site like this.

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