I posted this morning about all my mixed up feelings.. I had far too many plans today & couldn't make a single decision without having a break down. I finished up my day & thought I'd see my boyfriend for a while tonight, he was out with his friends & I went to meet them… long story short, he was so drunk, I felt like a fool and he was being very angry and paranoid towards me, the night ended because he got angry and walk away from me leaving me in the pub by myself, I didn't know anyone & I'd done absolutely nothing wrong. Almost in tears I tried to find a taxi frantically calling my friends and feeling like an absolute disgrace – why have I let myself be involved with this mess of a guy!? Hours later and texts of realisation he's sobered up a bit and come to the conclusion he was wrong and he needs to stop drinking so much – I'm happy he's realised, he doesn't expect my forgiveness straight away which I appreciate, I'm still getting over it All this has lead me to wonder tho whether its possible to have an entirely over active brain, that's making everything I feel heightened? Is that possible? I know I have an anxiety disorder, but I also always find that I fall for people really quickly – I feel I'm in love when I know I shouldn't be feeling that way, I don't know whether the instinctive parts in my brain just work too quickly, hence why I get anxious and fearful so instantaneously…. its a mad theory I know, but its 5.10 in the morning and I'm debating this in my head so its best I write it out than keep it trapped in my mind. A mix bag of a day, but the real stress arrives when I get back to derby tomorrow (a chance at least to get some time away from the boy and assess my thoughts)… let the fun begin!

  1. jamesFake 10 years ago

    what matters is that everything became alright in the end:)

    0 kudos
  2. VividDreamer 10 years ago

    I wonder is that true :S. Never thought about that. I fall in love really easily too and I\'m rarely out of relationships.

    I hope that things work out for you and your boyfriend but if it a continuous cycle where he is like this a lot be careful. This might make your anxiety worse.

    I hope you will be okay 🙂

    0 kudos
  3. Bec20 10 years ago

    Thank you 🙂

    Yeah, he seemed to have realised his mistakes and its down to alcohol, he\'s promised it won\'t happen again and he\'s determined to make it up to me… So I shall wait an see what happens 🙂

    Hope you\'re both well and having a good day x

    0 kudos

Leave a reply

© 2022 WebTribes Inc. | find your tribe

Log in with your credentials


Forgot your details?

Create Account