I am a new member to OCDTribe. I am being treated for an OCD of scalp picking. In 2002 I was watching television one night and for some reason unknown to me I started to scratch my scalp on the top of my head. By the time I even realized what was happening I had scratched a spot to the point where there was hair loss. I have been doing this ever since. I am and will always be on Effexor (prior depression) and my Dr. started me on Celexa for the scratching. I believe my OCD is not quite the normal case as I do not experience a specific thought to trigger the picking. What I feel is an overwhelming "urge" inside me that cannot be satisfied unless I pick. I hate this! I waste so much time sitting with a mirror and picking my scalp that it is embarrassing. I have tried wearing gloves, wearing a headband over the spot – so far nothing has worked. It is such a good feeling when I pick. But when I finish I am disappointed in myself again and again and again. I cannot say the Celexa has helped. Sometimes my arm gets sore from being raised to pick. It makes no sense to me in my head, yet I still do it. I really really want to stop. A couple of month ago I did actually stop for about two weeks – but the overwhelming urge started again and so did the picking. What used to be a small spot the size of a dime is now the size of a quarter. Luckily I can cover it with my hair as it would be so embarrassing if someone else noticed it. Is there anyone out there who can relate to my problem??? I am SO sick of OCD.
I'm biting my nails right now and picking on old scabs at the back of my neck that I just can't leave alone. The thing with me is, it's like I enjoy doing it and when I'm finished and see the result of my picking I am not happy and tell my self I will not pick on my skin or bite my nails again but yet I still do it and mostly without even thinking about it. The skin around my nails is sore from picking on it and the scar would heal and I would start again. I'm actually embarrassed to even talk about this here as I'm scared of what will people think of me. My sister can get quite frustrated and shouting a lot but she never picks on her skin or anything and yet I always do it. I really hope it's all connected to ocd if I even have ocd.
I can sooooo relate to the scalp picking. In addition to my obsessions etc. I pick my scalp and my skin. I have scars all over my body, and I haven't cut my hair in over a year because I'm too embarrassed to let a hairdresser see my scalp, because it's a mess. I have to wash my hair soooo often because my hands are always in my hair and my hair gets greasy. I take Effexor too. But no, it does not help with skin picking. I think Bruce Hymen and Cherry Pedrick have a workbook called the "Habit Change" workbook that is supposed to be really good. I haven't tried it yet though, my obsessions are more bothersome to me at the moment.
I can relate. I can get stuck in the mirror picking at my face. By the time I am done, I look ridiculous. My face is super red and blotchy from popping every little zit or blackhead, that no one else could even see before. I notice it is a way for me to zone or "check out" of my mind for awhile. I have racing thoughts constantly, and when I do that, my mind is soley concentrating on picking. Its the only way my mind knows how to stop thinking and give me a break for myself for awhile. I stop because I can see in the mirror how silly I am starting to look, and I am super self-conscious about my appearance, so luckily that makes me want to stop picking my face. I have noticed that the things that help me are 1.) EXERCISE (you won't believe how much this helps. I used to run but i am into weights now. 2.) Prozac. (this keeps my thoughts becoming too overwhelming. I can relax a little for once) 3.) talking to my best friend about my fears. Mine usually consist of "Am I too fat? Am I looking old? Do I need my teeth redone? Am I intelligent enough? etc. My obsessions have manifested in eating disorders and I find it very similar to ocd if not the same. Talking to her helps to calm me in that moment that I am so fearful of something that is keeping me from being productive. and finally, 4.) I keep myself so busy I don't have AS MUCH time to obsess( i still find time ,just not as much) I go to school, bartend, and take care of my toddler. That keeps me somewhat in check. Idle time is dangerous time. Sometimes I try to change my habits into cleaning. I don't like to clean but once I get started….u know, I can't stop.lol Damn that obsessive compulsiveness! Its more productive to clean my house then pick at my face. My boyfriend likes it a lot more when I have a clean house as opposed to a red face!! lol. I try to laugh at myself, because you have to or it will drive you insane. I think ocd is a constant struggle, but it can get better if you find the right tools that work for you. It is frustrating because why am I letting my thoughts control me as opposed to me controlling them? I am getting better at it and i hope this can help you.