well today was a good day for me. got off work came home spent time talking about the day with my family. made me feel really good. i know this is not an easy thing to deal with when going through recovery and i think lastnight i said i know it will be times i will be tested. but i didnt think it would happen in the same night. right when im settling in to go to sleep lastnight a so called friend hits me up and says they want to go get hit and am in for it. i said no. now any other time i would have jumped up and went and would have ended up spending that money i have managed to save in the bank. but i said no. snd even after that happen i thought on it for awhile. but i was able to stick with it and got muyself to bed thank god. thats another big step for me. im trying my best to leave people alone in my life that are not there to do me good. it amazes how when iver told folks im not getting down with that its like they get upset with me, but that made me realize they were nevet my friends to start. they were just there because we could get high together when there money run out we spend mine when mine run we would look for some elsde to spend. this past week has been a real eye opener for me. but its all for the good. i heard someone say you cant drive while looking in your rearview becsuse you not gonnas stay straight and you gonna run off the road. so i know i need to just keep my eye on the road and going forward dont look back. and take it day by day. i can honestly say im happy right now. and that i have made it day 6.
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Day 6, Fantastic, love reading this stuff, keeps my up at night smiling, honest to God. I always liked to think that I was on a one-way highway. As long as I kept moving forward some people may pass me, they may even honk, but if I stopped completely they were going to drive right up my rear end and if I turned around, well i was looking for a head on collision. We can always remember our past by laking a glance in the rear-view mirror but we DON"T have to stop to dwell on it. Very few an active addict will ever wish you well so don't expect it. It's sad but true! Great holding the course, keep on truckin'. Looking forward to hearing about day 8!
Alan