It is okay to be unsure about your current life situation and just work with your unique options. Is there any other option really? We all have different and unique choices that only we can make everyday.
I feel like the direction that my life has taken sounds ideal to many people. Yet, what they do realize is things sound better than they really are at times. It is like the saying the grass is always greener situation.
People can make assumptions about others and their lives. It is their choice but it is unfair to resent others based on untrue assumptions. They don’t know what unique challenges others are facing and have faced in the past. The same energy that is going to being resentful could be used in being a kind friend who is loving and supportive.
If I reveal nothing about my life; other women assume I am in a privileged economic position because I take the time to present my self well.
Yet, if I reveal the challenges I face and the positives, I sense resentment. I end up getting rejected as a friend.
A neighbor’s husband told me immediately after meeting me that I would have challenging time here because he said I was nice and pretty. Women would hate for both reasons. The.nice part makes them look bad and the pretty part made them feel like I was s threat to their lives.
Women.in this area tend to let them themselves go and they tend to resent other women who don’t try to blend in: I don’t want to look untidy and not show my femininity. I want to wear my pretty dresses and stay s kind person.
The assumptions I here include been:
- I was asked why I looking for a job when I am married at job interviews.
- I was hired a personal assistant and learned that he expected sex as part of the job. I said no and was let go.
- My husbands sister keeps demanding to know how many dresses I own. It is a odd question. My answer is I don’t know. Why would someone count their clothes is beyond me for someone else. She calls anyone who dresses up “too Hollywood.” Her idea of the only way to present yourself is look like you are a extra in a motorcycle gang movie. To each their own though.
- Husbands mother accused me of spending all of her sons money because I tend to be more dressed up than casual. She belittles my crafting abilities and get had demanded that I use my gifts to crests things for her. I don’t have to make things for others but I would teach them for free to make their own craft items.
- I went to the grocery store in a dress and pretty marching hat. A man wearing hunting clothes asked me what I looked that when it wasn’t Sunday! I could of asked him why he was looking like he was hunting in a grocery store!
- People ask me what high school I attended. It always happens like this, I say from anther state. They look horrified and say go back to where you came from…. Yes, people around here seem to think the world stops here. People happily live in other places!
- I gave up on my ever finding a job or friends here. Then; I looked at volunteering. It is not s option because of my lack of criminal background and there are more people here who commit crimes and not enough community service “jobs” for all of them. I would have to commit a crime, and be sentenced to community service and then be placed on a waiting list.
I was told to just find a regular job or go back to where I came from! Sigh! I can’t find a job here because I don’t look a motorcycle gang extra, wear clean clothes and have good hygiene! The nerve of me!
I live in a strange place. I exist here and leave town to do errands to enjoy people who aren’t hateful and closed off to outsiders. I am grateful they don’t include me as a “local.” Thanks for reading! I hope that you have lovely and content day!