I am feeling so hurt and angry at the sitation I am in with my husband. About a month ago he finally told me that he was unhappy and unsure of his feelings for me. That it started when my depression did and he didn't want to share this as he thought it might make my depression worse. SUch a cop out! He is responsible for his emotional health and honesty and integrity are a part of that. This pattern he has had his entire life but this situation highlighted that.
So, we are supposed to talk once a month and I suppose we could talk more if we desired. Tonight I was riding through the lights in the part with my kids and my oldest Forest who is 4 said that last year Daddie, him and calvin and her rode through the park. I was shocked and dismayed. I asked him again and again and he wouldn't give any details, it wasn't until I got home that I asked him if hemade it up and he said yes.
Well, I called my husband immediately and asked him, he says no. But since my emotions were high I then began interrogating him, as I often do when I am losing control. I realize that I need to turn the focus off him and to take care of myself now.
The phones service cut us off and he warned me it would, but I left a message for him to call me.
I don't even know what to say anymore or how right now. My emotions are high and I was alone with the kids all day feeling alone and scared as I don't want to become a single mom.
I asked him during the call if anything had changed and he said no, he still doesn't know if he wants to be with me or not. Yet he also said he did feel some hope…but we lost the call.
I feel obessed in some way, like I need to call him again.