So I wrote this whole entire thing but when I was switching tabs I accidentally exited out…. I'll just rewrite it because I'm really passionate about it and I still need to vent.
So I started writing this because I have so much f-ing homework. It's just one of the many weights that are weighing me down everyday. I feel like with everyday that passes more and more weight weighs me down. I'm getting to the point where I want to cut myself again and I told myself that I wouldn't go back there because that ruins you. You feel good at the time but the sterotypes that follow cutting yourself are horrific. While you go through school, you have to wear a facket or something because people do whisper about you. They whisper so many bad things that you want to cut yourself again. I just want to talk to my boyfriend. For more than a couple of seconds. The restriction between us is tearing me apart on the inside. Let alone what's happening on the outside. We are drifting apart as everyday drifts by. I'm dying inside. It's physically and mentally killing me. I know what you are thinking. You are way to young to be experiencing true love. Who says? Why can't I be really in love at the age of 16? People have done it before. Who says we can't be high school sweethearts that get married and die together? I know, it's like a one in a million change but who says that we can't be that one?
I can tell you who. My mother. Aren't mothers suppose to be all supportive? Not my mother. She like the oppisite. I want to tell her about all this but she won't understand and even if she does she won't do anything about it. I think she purposely wants me to suffer. I'm just…. so tired… I need some help… I need… a knife…