New Game Plan: His dad says he and I will go with my fiance’ tomorrow to his appointment and wait outside.  If he needs to talk to us then we will be there for him.  What about tonight?  Sometimes it is hard to get through today with him.  I hate working while he is suffering cause I can’t be there for him.  I wish I had the financial ability to just be able to take care of him during this time.  I’m scared shitless, but I’ll never let him know that.
from online i read:

How you can help
Every member of the family can be a valuable source of strength and comfort. With your help, the person with OCD is more likely to have success with treatment and be able to live a more normal life. Here are some things to keep in mind:

  • Do your research. Understanding what OCD is and its effects will make you better able to offer support. Let your loved one know that others suffer from this condition and he or she is not alone in this struggle.
  • Accept that rituals and obsessions can’t just be stopped. OCD is a complicated mental illness. It is not easy to let go of disruptive thoughts and behaviors. They can’t just be "turned off" like a switch.
  • Resist the urge to criticize. Negative comments will only cause the person with OCD to feel shame and guilt.
  • Be positive and patient. Offer praise when your family member makes improvements, but know that there may be setbacks along the way. Keep both short- and long-term goals in mind.
  • Don’t help with rituals. You and other family members may want to talk to a therapist for advice on how to remove yourself from these behaviors. It’s important to be consistent and firm in refusing to take part. Otherwise, the life of the enabler can be disrupted more than that of the person with OCD.
  • Communicate well. Be open and honest with your loved one about your expectations and encourage him or her to do the same. Offer to be a sounding board for concerns, fears and worries.
  • Take care of yourself. It can be exhausting to live with someone who has OCD, especially when you are trying to help in his or her recovery. Make sure to find time for your own interests and needs, too.

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