Greetings fellow OCDers!
Its been a LONG time since I've signed on and I apologize for my abscence – I have been extremely busy trying to keep up with my studies and surviving college.
I have been through a lot of new experiences here at college – some good, unfortunately some bad – but I'm alive and I guess thats what matters. =)
So far living away from home has been an interesting experience. I meet interesting people and have fortuately become the "nice guy" on campus. yes, I'm still viewed as strange or awkward for my OCD – but so people have accepted it as just a part of me, something I still struggle with at times I suppose. I have made friends with the cleaning staff, which has helped to ease my discomfort as far as germs go. They seem to appreciate someone as clean as myself and like that I appreciate their hard work in keeping the place clean and germ free.
I have made a few big changes in my life. My New Years resolution was to be more direct – not to let fear prevent me from living my life. So far, I'd say it paid off. I found a nice girl from back home, and although it took me several months I finally mustered the courage to ask her out. We've now been dating a month (although most of that time has been spent apart due to distance between home and school) but I am faced with a new obstacle: How exactly does one tell a significant other about OCD? It not like I can say "Oh yea, now that you've agreed to date me here's the fine print on new boyfriend" But I can't wait til we're together for 6months and then say "Oh yea didn't I tell you? I have this weird disorder that makes me a bit difficult sometimes. Must've slipped my mind, silly me" She knows that I am a "neat-freak" but as many of unfortunately know, that's just the tip of the iceberg. But she doesn't know about my therapist, whom I will resume seeing in June, and she doesn't know about why I go there.
I almost feel torn. Like I am sort of "normal" for lack of a better word, and yet every so often something happens that reminds me that I do still have this and that its not going to go away. Its almost like being a superhero – You have this side of you that seems normal to other people. You put on the fake suit and the glasses and walk around as a "normal" person. But deep down inside, you know that's not you – and you know that it's risky to let others know that you are unique.
So I'd like to ask of our community: If you are dating, married or ever have been dating or married in the past – how do you explain something like this to the other person?