I am new to all of this so some things I may say may be taken incorrectly, due to me just getting the information into my head and trying to seperate it and understand it.
I currently have a significant other that is dealing with depression. It has gotten increasingly worse as of late and I am trying to research and find avenues of information to help me not only help him but help myself understand and be a better supporter. He is constantly in what he calls a "black hole". Some days are worse than others. He picks things out to attack or just shuts himself off completely. He sees his life as going no where and states he has always been a planner and now it seems as all that he has planned or hoped for is not going to happen. One instance in particular is me not being able to move where he is at. He stated when he finally realized that I was not going to be with him any time soon that it just dropped him into a void. As I have impressed, we are in a long distance relationship so it is hard for me to be there all the time and be his shoulder on some days when things are the worst. I have had to deal with the "I want to just die" comments and him being in the closet with his gun. He, of course, has not followed through with it yet, but I am at the point now of "when is it going to be the day he does". I have tried to talk him into seeing someone and he has been on several medications and says nothing works. That he will get through this himself. How can he? I try to listen and be supportative and give him positive comments and send loving texts, emails and voicemails, to have them thrown back in my face as something I am wasting my time on. I feel frustrated and weakened every day. I hope that someone reading this will be able to lend me a hand. Show me what I am missing. I love him dearly and feel so overwhelmed with all of this. Instead of me looking forward to talking to him, I wonder what I am going to get on the phone or in person when he comes down. It's like..what is today going to bring and how much more can I take? I just want to help!