Why do I keep trying, why do I go on and on, and on, day after day with no end to this misery in sight? I tried to talk in the chat room with someone about it, but no one payed attention, as usual. Once again, I have nothing to do today, nor anywhere to go. People say that this website has been great in helping them, so why do I just get ignored? I try to make friends, and do for a time, but eventually I just get ignored or blown off, I don't understand why. I don't think I've done anything.

     It's going on 3 years, and I still can't get over how hurt rebecca made me. I just wish I could make all this hurt go away, it serves no good purpose for me, but Ijust can't get over it. What's worse is now I have no health insurance, and no money to afford it, so I can't get help. I hate the fact that this country will do anything to help an immigrant make it or get better, but nothing for people born in this country, why? I just want to die, and I'm geting close to just grabbing a knife, close my eyes, and just go away from all this pain and suffering for good. In fact I might as well, it's not like anyone reading this will even care. How could any of you, no one on here knows me. I can feel myself slipping awaymore and more every day that goes by. Who'ld miss me anyway. I have no friends to be concereened about me. Parents who all my life made me feel like nothing bugt a burden, in between my dad yelling and beating the crap out of me. I never talk to anyone about stuff thats bothering me. No oned cares about me, I might as well be dead. I wish, ssssssooooooooo, sssssssssssoooooooooo, much that someone out their could help me, but I know there isn't, I'm just a lost cause in life, a failure, a loser, nothing more, and it sucks knowing that too. To any one who reads this, be thankful for the people who you love, and love you back, I wish I had that.Someone to give me a hug, or a kiss when I'm sad. Someone, when I'm feeling down to tell me it'll be alright. Be thankful if you have a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, brother, sister, anyone who is their for you to do that for you. Stuff like that through an e-mail just isn't the same.

     Idon't know how much longer I can go on all alone. I wnat someone to love sooooo sssoooooo badly. Help me.

2 Comments
  1. melinaplum 11 years ago

    Stop beating yourself up ! its not you its other people, they dont understand until they have been through it! you really need an ear to bash!  I care how you feel ! you are as important as anyone else in this  planet so be strong!

    and try and laugh at  all of the other ignorants!, you are brave enough to write on here! you are not on your own msg me!

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  2. endthis 8 years ago

    I,m so miserable this program won,t even let me on

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